Joan de Boer

Joan de Boer died peacefully on February 1, 2023 having said her goodbyes and surrounded by family.  Although it was her time and she was ready, she will be greatly missed by many.

Joan was born on the island of Java, Indonesia, on September 18, 1933.  Her family fled to the Netherlands in 1941 knowing that imperial Japan would soon invade.  She shared stories of her youth about the German occupation, losing Jewish friends, and living through the “hunger winter.”  She also often spoke of Eerde, an international boarding school located in Ommen that she attended in her teens.  At Eerde, she developed a love of Shakespeare and poetry, made lifelong friends, and found her true self. 

In the early 1950’s Joan met Tob de Boer at a party. Chemistry was evident from the start.  They married in 1956, and soon emigrated to the United States, first to Silver Spring, Maryland, and then to Ithaca, New York, which was their home thereafter.

Joan lived a very full and adventurous life.  In addition to being a mother to three children, Joan served many years as a teacher’s assistant in the Ithaca City schools – Cayuga Heights, BJM, and Northeast.  She also taught Dutch at Cornell. Once retired, Joan volunteered at the Cornell Apple Orchards, the Farmer’s Market or the Botanic Gardens when she wasn’t running, swimming or cross-country skiing.  She loved being in nature – looking for early spring wildflowers, identifying birds and walking the dog on trails all over Ithaca.  She enjoyed singing songs from musicals, reciting poems of Keats and Kipling, and lines from Macbeth.  Joan cared deeply for anyone or anything in need.  Many organizations, local, national and international, benefited greatly from her generosity over time.  Most of all, Joan loved her friends and family.  Her marriage to Tob brought her so much joy, as did spending time with her children and grandchildren. 

Joan often had sayings she would share at certain times.  One was “many hands make light work” to show her appreciation for help received. Another was “best to leave when you are having a good time” – her experience that sometimes the fun can run out unexpectantly.  A third, “all good things must come to an end.”  And so the end arrived for Joan, but her spirit of kindness, perseverance and at times, mischievousness will live forever in all those who knew her.  

Joan is survived by her son Maarten (Venetia), and her daughters Claire (Jeff) and Yvette (Linnie), as well as grandchildren Willem, Rowan, Cobus (Lauren), Ilona (Dave), Ayla, step grandchildren Clio and Dot and one great grandchild, Olive. She was predeceased by her husband, Tob (1930-2016). A celebration of life to honor Joan is being planned for Saturday June 10, 2023 at 11 AM at the large pavilion in Stewart Park. 

            The family extends their gratitude to all the Kendal caregivers who supported our Mom over the last few years.  In lieu of flowers, please consider planting some tulips or daffodils in Joan’s honor. Arrangements have been entrusted to Bangs Funeral Home, online condolences can be left at www.bangsfuneralhome.com.

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